Happy Mother's Day 2016

I am a bit of a collector of hobbies...

I have done a LOT of stuff!  I an a reader, a blogger, a DJ, a Movie Buff, a jewelry maker, a crafter, an actress, a film editor, a graphic designer, a traveler, a screenwriter, a cook, a yoga enthusiast, and God only knows what else I've attempted to turn myself into over the years!

Take all this into account, and my hands down, FAVORITE thing I've been so far is a MAMA.

Being a Mother for me is the most rewarding and challenging adventure I have ever embarked on.  It's wonderful, terrible, amazing, and horrifying all at the same time!!! 

From the second my sweet boy entered this world, I knew being his Mama is exactly who I am meant
to be.  When his sister, my beautiful little lady, entered our world three months ago, it just confirmed for me that I am exactly where I want to be in this life.

That doesn't mean it hasn't been challenging...

I go back to work tomorrow after three trying and beautiful months with both my babies.  I am filled with a rainbow of emotions today, on my first Mother's Day as a Mama of two.  The thought of leaving the two of them tomorrow is breaking my heart into a million pieces, and I can barely stand the thought of it.  I can't help but look back on the last three months and think of everything I have learned.

• I am so glad I enjoyed every moment I could cuddling and paying complete attention to Benny when he was born, because you DO NOT GET TO DO THAT WITH BABY #2!!!
• Feeling guilty is most certainly a part of being a Mama that simply never goes away.  As a matter of fact, you just feel more guilty about more things as time goes on and you inevitably mess more and more crap up.  Embrace it and know that it just means you are doing a great job!
• You really CAN'T do everything.  You just can't.  Something has to give somewhere, so be very careful how you prioritize the time you have.  Figure out what is most important to you and your babies, and focus on that.  For me, I choose cuddles over cleaning and laughing over laundry.  This means I simply have to be unapologetic over my mess of a house while my babies are still little.  It goes so fast so enjoy what matters, and forgive yourself for what falls through the cracks.
• You will find yourself in many, MANY uncomfortable situations each and every day as a Mama, and if you want to survive you NEED and MUST find the joy in every situation!  This is survival 101.  You will be puked on, pooped on, and peed on.  You will burn the dinner trying to keep the baby from crying.  You will pour out the freshly pumped breastmilk because you are too tired to know what the hell you're doing.  You will read "That's Not My Puppy" 47 times a day, and you will watch the Uptown Funk video 147 times a day.  In every situation you must laugh, smile, and dance right through!!!  
• And...pay attention to this one Mamas... you will cry.  You will ball your eyes out uncontrollably at times and feel like you can't go on.  You will feel like a failure, like nothing is going to be ok.  You will feel like everyone else is so much better at this Mama-ing thing than you.  This is ok.  It's ok to break down, and when you do it you have to try to remember one thing.  YOU. ARE. NOT. ALONE.  Every Mama feels like this now and again.  Let the tears out, let yourself cry, then get up and remind yourself that you ARE a bad ass Mama.  You ARE doing an amazing job.  If you are still questioning yourself, just look at the smile on your little one's faces that are filled with pure love for you.  
• As much as you love that time with your babies, you need a freaking break from time to time.  Even if it's just a long shower alone (so hard to come by), take the help from those who offer and get away for a minute.  You'll be a better Mama because of it.
• You know how hard it is, so try not to judge anyone else for how they are getting through this business of being a Mama.  Mama-ing is hard, and we are all struggling.  Help each out out, build each other up, but NEVER judge each other with harsh words for taking a different route on the same path.  It's a guessing game for all of us, and I'm sure you've messed up something just as bad as the Mama you are judging has!  God knows we all do...

These are just a few things on my mind today.  So, I leave you with this.  I know it's hard, it's impossible, but man is it OH SO REWARDING and BEAUTIFUL!!!!  Find the joy in those hard moments, because everyone always tells you that the hardest times are the ones you will miss the  most before you know it. To drive home my point, here is a beautiful picture my husband took of my babies and I this morning.  I figured I'd share, because if this picture doesn't exemplify EXACTLY what it means to be a MOM, I don't know what does!!!!

Happy Mother's Day you beautiful ladies!!!!